I don’t like birthdays.
I know for some that puts me in the same category as people who aren’t fans of puppies or free pizza or three-day weekends, all things I love and none of which require forced celebrations and cards with aggressive age “jokes”(DEAR GOD YOU’RE OLD, CAN’T BELIEVE YOU’RE STILL ALIVE! HAPPY 40TH YOU SAGGY SACK OF BRITTLE BONES!).
You …